First Integration - Speaking the Truth

[sister goshe]

The first Integration I have found incredibly profound. I am grateful for this key -> speak the truth in order to stay "centered in the clarity of one's OWN deeper life experience."

First, my whole life I've always been a truth speaker; sometimes it worked out right, but very often the truth is too hard for the recipient to hear.

I've shyed away from speaking the truth - particularly at work, where the boss has the power to fire me if he decides he doesn't like me. I need my job, and I bet numerous people in America find themselves trapped into keeping their mouths shut to keep their jobs because they just don't make enough money to quit.

This might be the hardest insight/integration to be consistent with - all of the time, with everyone... but I see it's importance...

I would like to quote from the Twelfth Insight, page 17, "telling the truth of one's situation, whatever it happened to be, kept the flow going - and primarily because it kept one centered in the clarity of one's OWN deeper life experience." Sounds like it helps us to keep OUR own, my own sanity. Love it!
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Sister Goshe

[1Believer]

So please forgive me if I don't quite get things correctly.
I wanted to address the 1st Sight: To speak the truth, one does not need to argue, critcize, or hurt another. Speak the truth calmly and if you sense that the truth will not be recieved, then drop the subject. Later I will bring up the truth in a humorous manner. As I would leave my office at the end of the day, I would say good-bye to my boss. Sometimes he would want to talk, I would end this conservation with, "Well you know I only work here for the money, Ha, Ha." I always received a $1,000 increase in my salary every year plus bonuses. I have never actually asked for a raise. What I find difficult is, "What actually is the Truth?" Mostly I go with what is the truth for me. But really I have noticed that over generations, truths change. What is true for me may not be true for you. I find that if I stay in a certain frame of mind (loving) I have no problem with this. All of these insights need to come naturally to you. I find it is not the words but the energy with which the word is spoken that is needed by the other person to understand the words. We should leave them feeling better than we found them.

[SeekingIt]

As in the previous post, "the truth" and "my truth" may differ; ususally not by much. I have learned not to speak the truth unless it is solicted. I find to get to that point one may first ask a question, such as, "Do you think that's a good idea?" If then the person does ask for input, answer truthfully and carefully. This also gives the individual the opportunity to state their position which can lead me to better understanding. I have to really listen to what the person is saying, not trying to think of a way that I can convince them of my position. If the person I am speaking with continues to press for my input I preface my reply with, "From my perspective" or "It has been my experience", then I provide my truth to them. They can take it or leave it. This method helps keep power and control out of the situation. Should the person become hostile I often find myself on the defensive. I am working hard to recognize this and name what is going on such as, "You appear angry....." When I take this approach it usually stops the person in their tracks as they consider what was said to make them angry. For myself this anger is when a core belief I have held has been challenged and I need to re-think that core belief. Remaining open to new concepts and ideas can sometimes challenge me until I have had time to think it through.

[sister goshe]

Haven't either of you ever worked somewhere that had a lot of problems? Everyone knows when the culture of a place is fear and punishment and the students at my school know the administrative staff is oppressive and all of my colleagues and I talk about how we just suffer because our administrators don't want to hear the truth. They have pulled the wool over their own eyes and seem to try to treat us like we should also pretend like everything is hunky dory to fool each other and our less-wise students... as if they can't tell either.

Ok, I don't say a word unless asked either, but then what? Come right out with all of what they seem to be blind to? Hardly, I hold it in, play the game to avoid getting fired, and hope for a better job.

According to the 1st Integration this is bad, but I see it as forced survival.
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Sister Goshe

[1Believer]

We live a third of our day working. So you are saying that for a third of your day you are afraid of being fired? You live in fear? I would not be able to work under those conditions. My husband tried and had a massive heart attack and did not work for 5 years. I always had a rule about work. If work entered my dreams at night so that I found myself working night and day, I seriously started looking for better job. In the process, I always managed to increase my salary too. Your administrators probably know the truth of what is happening in your workplace but they take some perverted pleasure in maintaining status quo. Have faith that if you place your intention to finding your dream job, you will find it. May God bless you and help you find the life you deserve.

[Jennihul]

First let me say that I loved the insights revealed in James' new book.

I tend to believe that each soul is on a path of discovery that can really only blossom in a fashion that is known to their higher self. Therefore, I do not feel compelled (anymore) to hit them over the head with my opinions, my truths or my timeline for spiritual enlightenment. I have been allowed, by the grace of God and my friends and family, to grow at my own speed and everyone deserves that freedom. Mayan timelines, notwithstanding.

I have no fear that there will not be enough enlightened souls when the time comes. We truly have no concept of what six billion souls looks like, so we worry that the critical mass may not be met. It will.

I agree that if a person asks for advice, then truth can be gently revealed. However, the caveat always exists that they may not be ready for what you reveal. I try to answer their query with a question of my own. Such as..."Why is that bothering you now?" Or "what has happened to make you wonder about that?" This way, you can get an idea about their true motivation for asking for your advice. I have a messed up friend who seems to ask questions of this nature to stir the pot rather than receive actual wisdom. It's her favorite energy stealing trick. Needless to say, I don't play her game.

As far as my own truth, even before the book was released, I have been trying to be more honorable in my word. I think, like being addicted to a substance, you may not even realize you have a truth-telling issue. Admitting you may have is the first step to a cure. I feel disgusted with myself if I let one get out. Only slightly less alarmed when I realize I was about to lie, but didn't. So it seems to be having a positive effect. I think before I speak now, which has an overall positive effect and I certainly speak less, in general, which, for some people, would be a truly enlightening experience in itself.

Jenni

[Theressa]

Hi All,

My take on Speaking the Truth has taken on a new slant in the last few days. I am working in an organisation with people who are high risk offenders, drug users and alcoholics and people with complex needs including mental illness. I have watched how the staff have to deal with these clients. This may mean having to take responsibility for somethings that you never did as a worker to diffuse the situation with a client who is getting aggitated and say for example, "oh it must have been something I have done." When in actual fact they may have been the one who lost the paperwork etc. The truth is however deceptive it is doing this, it is for the highest good of ones self as a worker and the client bending the truth. I am not sure if this goes against being truthful?

Blessings
Theressa

[michellepetkus]

Hi all,

I have yet to read the book so forgive me if I stray from the true essence of what the 12th Insight is trying to relay about Truth. What I will say is it seems like there are varying scenarios being expressed in this thread. Sister's truth is more akin to being truthful about how she feels about her work situation. Holding this truth in may hurt her in the long run because negative emotions are involved. Theressa's truth on the other hand is a conscious choice to avoid the true facts of a situation in order to help another from closing down. A sort of bending the truth for the greater good. And still others seem to be talking about truth in regards to their personal beliefs and realizing that we can't push those truths onto others without pushing them away. Interesting. I guess it makes me wonder what is Truth really. I gather what James is trying to express is the idea to simply be true to yourself, your feelings, and what you feel is right in your heart. When you follow that philosophy your openness will keep all doors and roads open to you.

Love,
Michelle

[sister goshe]

I am quitting my job - Believer1, I was living in fear. I feel better already.

I think Michelle made an interesting point about truth in different scenarios. A recent experience has put this insight into full focus for me.

Theresa, the workers in your correctional facility, I believe may be compromised by their environment. I hate to say it, but I now believe that TRUTH really does need to be told at all costs, in all situations.

Consider this short story... a teacher, Mr. A, is pressured daily, put down and treated as incompetent by administrators, and lives in fear a losing his job daily. He is indirectly informed that getting high test scores will make or break his career and job at his school. He is asked to tutor without compensation after school and on Saturdays, very few students come. Last year another teacher got away with helping with students cheat on their tests. On the day of the testing, he and a couple other teachers - stressed and afraid, also decide to help his students cheat. The administrators in the room "look the other way" while the assistance occurred.

The next day the staff is informed that an anonymous phone call was made reporting the school for cheating and there will be an investigation interviewing staff, administrators and students. The Principal insists that "the cheating did not happen," emphasizing indirectly that the position of everyone interviewed must be on the same page of innocence to keep the school out of the papers. Mr. A feels the spirit of truth leave him and his anxiety and desperation is at an all time high.

Over the weekend, Mr. A communicates his predicament with multiple friends and loved ones. Some say to keep up the lie, protect your job, avoid causing more problems for the GREATER GOOD. But many more say tell the truth - the damage is already done, DON'T TELL ANOTHER LIE TO COVER ONE UP. Mr. A's Church leader tells him his impression was that another lie would make this situation 100x worse.

Even Mr. A's blind date that Saturday seems to be a messenger from God telling him not to lie more.

Mr. A realizes that his integrity has been compromised by his surroundings. It was a subtle and slow digression, but he is a changed man, a shell of who he once was. The pressure and fear have warped his ability to make good decisions there and that the spirit of truth is not within the walls of the school.

He decides to tell the truth and quit his job, something he should have done a long time ago. His decision causes a liberating release of the horrible feelings of guilt and anxiety. He knows its the right thing to do.
A previously good and moral teacher loses his teaching license, and those who are willing to continue a lie keep their jobs.

Mr. A's admittance requires students to re-take their tests; they may even learn that cheating doesn't pay.

In difficult places it is even more crucial to tell the truth despite the consequences. Please believe me.
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Sister Goshe

[paul4829]

Incoroprate the higher truth as well, not just the surface level of truth that is there. All truths i believe need to be communicated not only for others, but to help yourself continue on the higher path. The deeper sense of self, the deeper sense that no longer feels alone but with everything. Each person, each soul, everything and anything is all apart of of this grand life. this thing we are apart of. Can we all agree on what this is, it's not only the divine presence. What do we call our world that will give it completion.

Higher truth stems from the oneness, a higher truth is a mutual understanding, a coalition of selves where both are connected to the divine and understand the plan and where it is going. It that sense truth will always help you progress on the path. The forwardness of synchronicity, the love of the divine, the connection of the divine. The life of lives itself! to help continue this world of ours. to see the progress, to love the progress.

this reminds me of a template group, the way in which we speak. Don't you see it! and the synchronicity of this proccess as well, i ended up finding this article by chance. Well, it was on google. =]

remember the divine, it's always there. And never stop dreaming and pursuing those dreams!

Bryan Runyan (Missoula, Montana)
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* feel free to contact me

[sister goshe]

What!? it was on google!? That's weird and a little un-nerving.

I hadn't thought of the idea that the group of people in my story was like a template group. Fascinating.


Here's the update: Mr. A has found forgiveness and feels better. Mr. A met with a member of the group and attempted to express his thanks and gratitude for the guidance, but was rejected. The other person wasn't ready to hear more truth.

I like what you wrote about the oneness you talked about "not only being the divine presence," but also "a coalition of selves...to the divine," "the love of the divine...to help continue.... the progress."

I paraphrased a little I hope you don't mind...
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Sister Goshe

[eve]

Hi sister goshe, speaking truth can be a difficult thing sometimes. My teacher drummed it into , truth speak your truth, always be truthful and I agree. But there is a but, sometimes the truth can cause great pain to the person you are being truthful to. So I ask myself, is it right to tell the truth when you know you will create great pain. I have pondered this thought a lot over the years. ?
To lie in normal circustances is simply a waste of energy.
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E.Vermazen

[sister goshe]

I think this ties into the other thread we were on... who am I to know what kind of pain would be caused by telling the truth? I could guess or imagine that it might hurt based on my experiences, but how do I know what the other person is feeling or needs to hear?

What about not talking at all? WHat about sins of omission? Pleading the fifth? Avoiding telling both truth and lie by not telling either? Is this preventing progression? Does truth have to be revealed or can it be kept?

Then I think about spies and other people whose job it is to lie and keep secrets.

Then I remember the story of Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott. In the story, Ivanhoe loves a princess. When he learns his princess has died, he proceeds to love a Jewess. During their love affair, Ivanhoe and the Jewess learn the princess is actually alive, and Ivanhoe, although his feelings are torn, returns to his princess. The Jewess and princess meet and the princess is wildly jealous imagining the worse has happened between this Jewess and her beloved Ivanhoe. The Jewess lies and tells the princess that Ivanhoe spoke only of her (the princess) the entire time she was with him. The princess accepts Ivanhoe and the Jewess leaves town. The final scene is the Jewess asking her father if it was right to lie. The father says it was.

Hmmmmmm....
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Sister Goshe

[paul4829]

sister,
may i ask how old is this story of yours? it speaks of princes and princesses of the old days. Well, what was the normal and cultural mindset in those days. Did we not use stories to inform our children of the world. but back then the world was a dark dangerous place. Full of fear and misunderstandings. Now, we get to see the beauty. Lies, i believe have a greater affect of pain and suffering on the being. Than truth ever will. Is it best that the sir and princess got back together?? Perhaps both of the souls felt it was time to leave paths and go and pursue something more. Who knows, they could've created a new life for them if they were to leave. Even synchronicity could have come from the event and something entirely new would've been created. But, i'm not too sure whether the stories of the past are relevant for the future not anymore. NEW stories must be created and told. Ones that speak of love, the divine, truth, synchronicity! all the gifts that we hold sacred.

what is right and wrong only exist within our most shallow perception. Life does not end with death. But without death we shall not live! truly live! if a man were to stay silent when faced with the death penality instead of admitting truth no matter what it shall be. Then he no longer grows! we all stop growing, to stay silent is to deny it exists. To forget is to dishonor all wisdom in which we know. And with lack of remembrance we no longer learn more. We must acknowledge growth in order to grow. We must acknowledge lack of growth in order to continue the process of growth. Growth lies with truth.

Believing the old way of thinking that you lie to protect, or little white lies. prevents us from growing past it and seeing that truth is one of the most beautiful and one of the most active processes in which we work in. All souls can detect a lie even before it is said. which makes it difficult to trust one another, and if we don't trust one another we don't connect and if we don't connect we don't love one another and sense we don't know one another we learn to fear one another. Even telling the truth, is a great leap into a new direction. And I believe we are all starting to understand this.
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* feel free to contact me

[bardictiger]